Tuesday, May 21, 2013

WIPpet Wednesday: "Sit Down"



      Happy Wednesday! I don't know how much has been made of it in international news, but here in the States, we're all feeling for the folks who have been impacted by the tornadoes in Oklahoma. If you're interested in seeing how book sales are going to help relief work, check out alanaterry.com/oklahoma

     Now for the WIPpet! I've been working on my Saving Natalie manuscript quite a lot lately. Sometimes it's really slow going, but that's no news to anybody's who's every gone into edits. What makes things even more tricky is that this manuscript is five years old. Anyway...we're back in the delivery room at this point. Since it's May 22, here are 22 sentences from page 5 of Saving Natalie.

***

Jessica adjusted the baby in her arms. “Do you want to hold her?” Baby Natalie squinted her eyes, and Jake worried she was about to cry. What was he supposed to do with a wailing infant? Natalie yawned, and then went to sleep. “You can sit down if you want.”


Jake hoped Jessica didn’t notice his hands shake when she passed the bundle over. Jake's stomach didn’t lower with him when he sank into the chair. Baby Natalie was lighter than he expected.

Jake felt Jessica stare but couldn't meet her gaze. “How do you feel?” Jake flinched inwardly. How many times had he thrown out that same mindless question over the past seven months?

“Exhausted.”

Jake figured Jessica was right. He wished she could wash that make-up off. Good thing there weren’t any mirrors around. No reason for Jessica to see how hideous she looked. Jake was about to ask how labor was, but when he eyed the blood-stained sheets lying on the floor he realized he really didn’t want to know all the grisly details.

“You can get some sleep.” Jake tried to ignore the unexpected wave of dizziness. “I’ll hold Natalie for a little bit.”

***

Random Fact: I'm pretty sure I've only had two sunburns in my entire life.

WIPpet Love: If you want to join the WIPpet fun, give us an excerpt from your current Work In Progress that has something to do with today's date (like 22 sentences from page 5 of 5/22), then link up at My Random Muse.

Don't forget! Help support disaster relief efforts when you buy The Beloved Daughter from alanaterry.com/oklahoma (Shipping to US only. Sorry!)

16 comments:

  1. Argh . . . ate my comment. *sigh* Okay, went something like this: What a cool thing to do to help support those folks in the midst of such tragedy. I commend you. :)

    I can really relate to Jake in this segment. I'm not so comfortable with babies myself. I love how he keeps himself from commenting on how "hideous" she looks. There could be hope for him yet!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, sometimes blogger is just hungry for comments. It seems like 95% of the special needs blogs I follow are blogger, while 99.7% of the writing ones are wordpress. Interesting. Yes, kudos to Jake for keeping his mouth shut. He's not quite as bad as Jessica's parents seem to think.

      Delete
    2. Hmm, I never actually thought about it, but yes, you're right about the difference between the posts I read on Wordpress versus Blogger. There is "some" crossover, but not that much.

      It would be interesting to know why.

      Delete
  2. This reminds me of a friend of ours who was very happy to visit after we had our babies, but (quite cheerfully) refused to hold them. Slightly less awkward than this situation, though.

    I can't decide whether I feel badly for Jake or not. I want to read the story to find out. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, I love being a mom, and I love my kids, and I'll hold your baby if it helps you out. Doesn't do much for me though, to be honest.

      Delete
    2. Oh, it's all right to feel sorry for Jake. He's not all that bad. :)

      Delete
  3. The news about the tornadoes in Oklahoma has certainly reached us in the UK and I think it's wonderful that you're donating money from your paperback sales to the relief fun - really hope you sell lots.

    I really got a good sense of Jake trying to keep it together in this scene and his awkwardness in holding Natalie for the first time. There's a lot of responsibility on his young shoulders.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Kate. Yup, he's trying. Gotta give him kudos for that.

      Delete
  4. Heh. I laughed a little at this scene. How many women have had pictures taken right after (or during!) birth only to see them later and think, "Oh my gosh! I look awful!" As one nurse so tactfully put it, "Giving birth is not dainty."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, not very dainty. I barfed each time, for one thing.

      Delete
  5. I think, out of the huge number of pictures my parents and husband took when our son was born, there is only one I like... I'm in it but my head isn't.

    Jake's given Jessica something to be thankful in the future for... no pictures! :-)

    As for the Oklahoma storms, yep... Have some online friends down that way. Been thinking of them. So very nice that you are offering sales of your books to that cause, Alana. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha, so true, Eden! These awful pics won't end up tagged on Facebook!

      Delete
  6. I do like that Jake is trying, even though he's clearly not at home in the situation.

    That's awesome that you're donating the proceeds from your book to the Oklahoma relief. We've seen a lot of the pictures here as well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much! Yeah, Jake probably gets high marks for effort.

      Delete
  7. Childbirth can look quite scary... poor Jake. Especially when you're slightly removed from the whole process. It must be hard for him.

    So glad you're able to support the people affected by the tornadoes. We've seen the coverage here too. It's incomprehensible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Raewyn, yes childbirth can be quite gritty! I hope you are enjoying a relaxing weekend and hope to see you around WIPpet Wednesday this week!

      Delete