Tuesday, December 16, 2014

WIPpet Wednesday: Writing With Kids

Happy Wednesday, everybody! Today, I'm sharing a snippet from the Torn Asunder Bonus
Materials, an ebook that contains the funniest typos, some deleted scenes, an alternate beginning, and just about anything else you'd like to know about how the Torn Asunder novel came into being. On the third Wednesday of the month, I'm sharing three paragraphs from the behind-the-scenes section, where I talk about my life in general as a writer. This section is called Writing with Kids.


I often wonder if I would be a much better mother if I wasn’t a writer as well. I’ve done a pretty good job compartmentalizing my work time, but compartmentalizing my energy is another matter altogether. Here’s what I mean. I never write before lunchtime. I hardly ever do anything writing-related, at least not on the computer.

The idea behind this schedule is to give my kids my best hours (yes, I’m a morning person), and then I can spend an hour or two in the afternoon on writing and go back to it when they’re in bed for the night. Unfortunately, even though that schedule theoretically leaves me “plenty” of time for parenting, I find my mind consumed with writing musings, plot daydreams, marketing ideas, etc. all the time, whether I’m “on the clock” or not.

I honestly don’t know the answer to this. I love my kids and hate to think they might look back on their childhoods and feel left out. Once my son told me it hurt his feelings when I was on the computer so much. Several years ago, I came to the conclusion that feeling inadequate to perform all your duties at 100% capacity just goes along with the territory of being a mother. Hopefully, it’s the house and the cooking that’s getting neglected as a result of my writing, and not my children.


I KNOW many of you can relate (whether you're writers or not.)

Blog Love: Huge thanks to K L Schwengel for hosting the WIPpet Wednesday blog hop, where authors post snippets from the current Works In Progress.

Random Fact: If I could pick one word I'd hope my boys would describe me as, it would be gentle. If I could pick two, the second would be playful. I'm not there yet, but I try.


  1. I can relate to this so much. It doesn't help that I write things for grown-ups, so my kids don't even get to read my work. I finally wrote something for my son and gave it to him to read the other day. He loved it!

    I've found that I need to make specific time that I'm not doing any work at all. Even so, I still feel like I haven't hit the right balance between work and family.

  2. I worry about this. Granted I do a lot of my writing at work, but I still catch my mind wandering when I'm at home.

  3. Now that my kids are a little older (13 and 10), I find I have more time overall for writing (especially since I read them a draft of Henry and Tisira's story, and now they WANT me to write, because they want that next draft...although I may need to cut a couple of scenes for them...

    My daughter writes more these days, and my son has started editing MLP fan fiction, so they both understand more about what writing is than they did when they were younger.

    What works well for me is to do short bursts of writing interspersed with hometending tasks. That gets me into house circulation frequently, and I tend not to get so carried away with the writing that I'm not available to interact. It also keeps me oxygenated and scrapes a layer of clutter off the top...so we all benefit.

    Most of my writing time is open-door policy. I save the extended and focused writing for times when they aren't home, or they're asleep or occupied. That's happening more as they grow into independence.

    I'm sure, though, that there are still times when I am not as available as they or I might like...

    I love this ebook idea, and I may have to nab it....

  4. You know...hubby and I spent all weekend fighting of this. No joke. So it's really nice to see that I'm not the only one with the problem of navigating time and feeling inadequate. What sucks is the always feeling someone inadequate. That I don't really want. This might be a good blog post just to discuss it since so many seem to struggle with it.

    1. I think it just comes with the territory of womanhood. I'm not one for returning to "a kitchen is a woman's place," but a couple hundred years ago, not much was expected of us. Now, regardless of whether kids are involved or not, we're supposed to do and be all the things: energetic, loving partners; ladder-climbing career girls; home, finance, & craft divas; beautiful AND extremely intelligent (because very intelligent just won't do). *eyeroll* It's ridiculous.

  5. Personally, I think that if you were to give up your writing and end up frustrated and resentful, no one would benefit, least of all your kids. When my kids were young, I did all kinds of things "wrong" but they are both now healthy individuals who make their own way in the world.

    We parents are also role models. I know that my son resents some of the choices I made, but my daughter does not -- exactly the opposite. And I still have a good relationship with my son, regardless.

    On the other hand, I know many families where frustrated dreams poisoned relationships in all kinds of directions.

    Good luck!

    Ruth (since Blogger keeps insisting I'm anonymous, no matter how I try to post ...)

  6. I don't have kids, but I've had some similar conversations with the hubs when we're each feeling our time is being encroached upon.

  7. This post has got me thinking, and I realise I am perhaps the one to complain when Other Half is consumed by his hobbies, even though I'll often go off into writing time and think nothing of it. Hmm.